00:00:00 Paula: Welcome to “TesseTalks” with your host, Tesse Akpeki and co-host, moi, Paula Okonneh. Where collectively we share with you top leadership and management strategies. This continues to be a journey of discovery. Because we are learning that leadership is personal and professional, and we certainly hope you will walk with us in this adventure. Now, tell me, what would you do if you lost your voice? And how would you feel if you are isolated from the outside world? A young lady finds herself held captive in her own home, alone and literally speechless. Learn how she finds self-confidence and transforms her life and get ready to feel excited and inspired, as you find your voice. Introducing our guest today, Renee Reish. We invite you to not just to listen, but to join us as she takes us on her compelling and inspiring journey of turning obstacles into opportunities. Renee’s personal story is honorable, and honest, and vulnerable. Let’s see her thoughts to erase self-doubt with real life strategies for business relationships and health. Her book is called “Finding Your Voice, Unlock Your Chains And Unleash Your Greatness, Personal Growth And Development”. And with that, I want to say welcome to “TesseTalks”, Renee. We are really, really pleased to have you here. In fact, you can hear that in my voice, can’t you?
00:01:54 Renee: Yes, I can. It’s honestly an honor and a pleasure, Paula, Tesse to be here, and to share my voice with your audience.
00:02:05 Tesse: Hi Renee. I cannot tell you how pleased I am that you’re on our show today. I mean, from the first moment I met you, I knew that I had met somebody who has such a gentle, tender, caring, compassionate spirit. And once you told me about your story, I thought, guess what? I’m going to read your book, and I bought it there and then, you know, on your online and I bought it. And you know, I’m curious, the curiosity is about hearing from you about how you overcame anxiety and negative emotions by listening to your inner voice. How did you do it Renee?
00:02:50 Renee: Really it’s a journey. You know,I’ll just like, well, I’ll just do that. You know, it’s having somebody in your corner to help you find your own voice that’s always been there. And for me, it’s my best friend who’s watching over me from heaven. And she is the one that helped me find and discover the voice from within. You can’t get it out if it was not there. I had just buried it so, so far down for so many years. And those stories that we tell ourselves, or have been told by somebody that maybe was a family member or a so-called friend, that allowed us to believe those self limiting beliefs. The stories that we tell ourselves, and I’ve told her soaps for so long. And that alone is what helps us discover our own voice from within, to release those limiting beliefs and to have somebody with you to help you see within yourself.
00:03:54 Tesse: It’s in you and it’s just coming out and you’re listening to that inner voice. Yeah. Paula?
00:04:01 Paula: I’m listening to her and I am seeing, you know, a woman who has overcome a lot. But I also heard in her voice that she was confident. Someone was looking out for her, her best friend. So Renee, can you tell us a little bit more about how that helped you overcome your deep fears and how you were able to build confidence to continue to deal with the challenges and peer pressure?
00:04:33 Renee: You know, a lot of it has to do with those own beliefs, when you come from that corporate world and am in charge of so many people like I was. The thing is I was running those teams, millennials, middle-aged older, so successfully. And I said, Ronnie, I was taking care of, but the one that wasn’t really running her life as best she could was the girl looking back at me in the mirror, which was me. And it was really easy to try to pour into others. But as we know that same goes, you can’t pour from an empty cup. And mine had been cracked so much. It was like Humpty Dumpty, putting back the pieces together, and having somebody in your life who believes in you so much, helps you believe in yourself.
00:05:22 Tesse: When I was growing up, that Humpty Dumpty on the wall and having a great fall was quite alive for me as a child. And as an adult now, it still is very, very relevant. So as an analogy, you know, Renee, that works pretty well, how Humpty was put together again. So it kind of like, in that kind of thread of stories and secrets, what secrets could you share with us about how we, how you overcome bad habits and behaviors? You know, behaviors, which may not serve us sometime. What secrets are there? What are your golden nuggets that you can spread along the way?
00:06:02 Renee: Really, what I would say, “it’s never give up and believe in yourself”. So having that voice, it’s always been there, make sure that you surround yourself with like hearted people. I didn’t say like minded. Because we have a monkey mind that so many times says you’re not enough, or who do you think you are? That imposter syndrome. What do you get off doing this? You’re just that. SoI say, like hearted, because your heart doesn’t lie. It’s what lies within that inner knowing that knows you’re here for a greater calling and a greater reason. And to follow that gut instinct, to follow your voice and follow your heart and surround yourself with those like parted souls to help you find that inner knowing that inner voice that’s laying down dormant like mine was. In losing my voice, it was so I can find my voice. It’s help others along their journey in finding theirs.
00:07:14 Paula: That’s pretty powerful. Losing your voice enabled you to find yours so that others could find theirs. That’s powerful Renee. And I know that’s what drove you to write your book, “finding your voice”. Can you elaborate a little bit on anyone who’s listening, in other words, words of encouragement. You know, because you lost your voice to find it, to help others find theirs. So there must be some words of encouragement that you have, or any tips you can share with our audience. Because this is very powerful to even hear your voice, physically hear your voice, that in itself is a testimony.
00:07:55 Renee: Absolutely, Paula, thank you for the question. I’m going to say that there was a time where I didn’t believe in me to be able to find my voice. And what I was taken out of corporate America, I wasn’t spiritual. When I say taken out by the owners, they had, it was called viral pharyngitis. So it literally took a grip, it took hold of my vocal cords. There were sores all over them. I was in the urgent care, the first I had driven myself to the urgent care, and I said, I feel like there’s a sore in my throat I told the urgent care doctor. And unless you’re a two year old, you say that you have a sore throat, you don’t say, I think there’s a sore in my throat, tell them it’s a sore throat. But I did say it was a sore that I felt. And she looked and she said, you’re right, there’s a sore in the middle of your throat. I said, that’s where I feel it. She took a rapid strep test. She didn’t find anything that was strep. She sent me back home. The next day, my best friend from heaven now, but with me then, took me back to urgent care and she, the doctor told my best friend, get her to the ER. The reason I tell you this part of the story is so I can step you into the finding those golden nuggets that you asked about. I was in that dark space for a while because I didn’t know how to find it within. I always say, when I go on different interviews, I wish I could tell the audience. I did this inner work and I journaled and I did this and I did that. I did none of it. I sat there. I was in pain. I cried. I could hear the tears coming out of my own body. I could hear that the voice of pain because I had no voice, just the salt water pouring out of my eyes down my cheeks. I didn’t know how to get out of it, to step back into life. I didn’t have an answer or just do this, just do that you’ll feel better. There was no magic pill the doctors could give me and say, check back with us in a week to 10 days after you finished your medication and we’ll see how you’re doing. There was no medication that they could give me. The medication was a step out of life and I don’t know who believes in what, but I’m going to tell you, there’s a much greater power than any one of us that is here for us and with us along our journey. And we do not know it at the time of suffering. We don’t understand why we are in such pain. In whatever pain you’re going through, I can tell you, you’re growing through. It’s in those moments of despair when you don’t think there’s any way out there is. And it’s to sometimes be quiet and taken out of life in another way. So you can step back into life in a stronger way.
00:11:01 Tesse: Paula, I don’t know about you, but Renee is really reaching me and those parts that I’m thinking, oh my word. That whatever you’re going through, you’re growing through. I mean, those are words that are so meaningful when you’re in the valley and in that very sad place. I mean, it’s kind of, you think, why me? Why now? You know, Renee, I, you know. If you touch others where you’re touching me, I know that you are doing great things in the world. Not just your book, your book is just one of the many ways that you can share your very powerful story with other people. How can they get you? How can they reach you? People who may want to know more about you, your book, your journey.
00:11:54 Renee: Absolutely Tesse, thank you. They can reach out to me on social media. I’m on Facebook, I’m on LinkedIn, I’m on Instagram. The only one so far that I’m not on is Tick-Tok, that might be down the road, I don’t know. I’ve touched every social media. I’m on clubhouse. I literally I’m on. I have my own room on clubhouse and women’s wisdom, it’s called “Finding Your Voice”. My group on Facebook is called “Finding Your Voice”. Message me on messenger, tell me that you saw me on this podcast. I would like to offer your audience a free ebook at the 10 steps to find your voice, and I will make sure you have it. Actually, I think I sent it to both of you, but I’ll make sure if you don’t that I do send that to you so we could put it in the show notes for people to grab for themselves to have that. And I invite you to take advantage of that. Also the book, make sure you have the link as well, to pick a copy of that. Because I’m gonna share this with you, if I may, is that okay to take a minute to share?
00:12:58 Tesse: Yeah.
00:12:58 Renee: At the end of each chapter, it’s a very short read by the way. It’s very, for people who are not big readers, it’s a very short read. And this is not a photoshop, it’s me. I’ve got a picture of me on Newport beach, California. Luckily the wave had it got over my head, it was behind me. I’m grateful about that. We’ve got a good still shot there. “Finding Your Voice Unlock Your Change And Unleash Your Greatness”. I’m going to say the subtitle is because it says, unlock your chains. The chains I was bound up in where my own. And the greatness is also my own to be unlocked and unleashed, which I’m doing here with you and your audience today, and which every single person who is listening has it within them too. But to reach out to me and let me help you, let me support you in your journey. It’s something that we need to have people around us to support us. So often I thought, oh, I could do this, I don’t need anybody. I know what to do. I’d been in this industry. I know people that do this. But it to actually take time out to invest in yourself so you can pour into others from that overflowing cup. That’s what it’s about. What I was starting to tell you about the end of each chapter. I don’t know if you can see it. There we go, the glare. I have what’s called a takeaway section. And in life, there’s a lot of takeaways. In the book I give you three to four lined pages, because I believe in the power of the pen. And what comes up will come out. Also, especially as women, we never give ourselves enough credit to where we’ve come from to where we are and to who we have become. Within the context and the text of this book, and these takeaways will help you find and discover the inner voice that has been waiting and screaming to come out of you. By writing down the answers to the questions that I posed. You can go back to this book and it now becomes an evergreen tool for you to use and utilize every three months, six months, nine months, a year, whenever you choose. I say choose because it’s a choice. This life that we’re living is a choice. The steps we take and the moves we make. To pick that book up again and again, over the course of your life, and see how far you’ve come from when you first answered those questions to where you are, the next time you enter those questions. And you can see your own growth from within.
00:15:34 Tesse: That’s lovely. Because what seems to be coming across to me when I hear what you say, Renee, is like taking an inventory, but also knowing that it’s a journey. You know, there’ll be pitfalls, there’ll be, you know other things, but there’ll be a lot of kind of high moments, et cetera. But actually to monitor, to evaluate, to see where we’re coming from, where we’re going to, what the journey has been like along the way, you know. That’s what comes to me about the journeying and the taking stock of, but also the celebration of life along the way too. Would you say that I’ve got an understanding?
00:16:13 Renee: You get two thumbs up for that one at a big heart. That is a beautiful understanding and a beautiful expression of the understanding. Because that is what it’s about, celebrating where you come from to who you have become from.
00:16:31 Paula: Got that celebration where you come from to who you have become from. I didn’t hear that the first time, but now you said. That’s very, very deep. And that’s something that sometimes we, as women struggle with, celebrating where we’ve come from and understanding that those steps get us to where we are. Because as you rightfully said earlier on Renee. “You can’t pour out from an empty cup, you can’t give what you don’t have”. Sometimes those journeys are what we have so that we could share with others and encourage them and inspire them to be the new person that they become from. Oh, I love it.
00:17:18 Renee: Thank you.
00:17:20 Paula: Oh, my word. Oh, my word.
00:17:23 Renee: I encourage your audience to get the book. You know, there is a Kindle version. Absolutely, everybody receives information differently. Some are kinesthetic, some are auditory. There’s different ways that we receive information. The reason I encourage the book is because of what I just showed you. The answers you have, the line page is three to four pages for you to actually pour into. And whether you use them all now or use some of them later, that’s up to you, whatever you want to express to those pages. It’s your journey. It’s your life, it’s your own chapters of your story. You don’t have to be an author to write and edit your own book. Because we are living our books and our chapters every single day in our lives. And I want to express that we get to, and I emphasize get to edit that story any moment we want to. You don’t have to wait for a new year or a new day. How about the next minute and the next minute and the next minute to do different and be and become different, to who you aspire to be.
00:18:33 Paula: Honestly, can we get an amen to that?
00:18:35 Tesse: I’m definitely saying Amen. I love the bit about editing. I mean, Renee, you would’nt know this and Paula, you definitely wouldn’t know this. Because this morning as I was going and walking in the park, I was thinking that life is not a rehearsal. We live each moment in the moment, if we are fully present, we live it that way. It’s not rehearsal. However, if we’re given tomorrow, which is a gift and we can edit it along the lines of our aspirations our inspirations, then we can achieve great things.
00:19:11 Renee: Absolutely.
00:19:12 Tesse: And you know, that just feeds into what you’re saying Renee about we get to edit it, if we’re given that chance. However, you know, it’s that thing about we have the now, and in the now we’d live it as fully as we can.
00:19:28 Renee: That’s so true, Tesse. And it’s being present. People talk about the future. The future is now, the future is the present, and I’m going to explain why. Because that sounds very counterintuitive. Like how is the future the present? Because this moment, and then this moment, and then this moment, and then this moment. When you’re present in the moment you are stepping into the future, and that very next moment to build the momentum to the next moments.
00:19:56 Tesse: That’s it, that’s beautiful. Paula, I’m really lost for words. You know me Paula, but Renee has done it. She’s filled in this space, I tell ya.
00:20:08 Paula: She has. And Renee that’s true, she’s rarely ever lost for words. So you have bowled her over. I mean your, everything you said, just touch just the right spot in her heart. But she is more of a word, she is my word smith and has always been. Yeah. Are there any reflections that you can still share with our audience Renee?
00:20:33 Renee: The biggest thing is to not give up on yourself. It’s easy, it’s really easy to do that. That’s like, you know what, I’m not doing this anymore, it’s too hard. I don’t, I’m just going to go back to this. Cause that was, you know, it was, it’s what I know. What I would say, step out of your comfort zone into your confidence. I developed a voice blueprints and “V” is vulnerability. The “O” is owning your voice. The “I” is igniting that flame of inspiration. The “C” is courage and confidence. The “E” is empowerment.
00:21:13 Renee: The V plus the O plus the C equals the E. And that’s what I do in my one-on-one and group coaching. So, if any of your listeners say, you know what, I was meant to be here to listen to this today, please reach out to me, please reach out to me. This life was not meant to be lived alone and asking for support is showing a strength within you not a weakness. I would never be where I am today had I not reached out with it. I need support, I can’t do this alone anymore. That was the first piece of finding my own voice. To be vulnerable and say, I can no longer do this by myself, I thought I could, but I can’t. And now I could be that vessel with a voice to inspire impact and empower others in their journey of life.
00:22:10 Paula: Wow, Renee this is really powerful. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, for talking about how you lost your voice so that others could find thiers through you find in your voice. And then given us that acronym, really powerful. Vulnerable, Ownership, Inspiration, Courage, and Encouragement. Those are powerful, powerful words.
00:22:36 Tesse: Absolutely. Yeah.
00:22:38 Renee: You know, empowered leaders and power leaders, that’s where the last piece is. E is empowerment. So you inspire, you empower, you encourage. And the word encourage is courage in courage. You have encouraged within that voice within, so the vulnerability, only the voice. Inspiration and igniting that flame. Courage and confidence equals the empowerment. And that’s why I developed that blueprint to serve and to support others in the journey of finding their own voice. So please reach out to me, let me know how I can best serve and support you on your own journeys. I have the free ebook. I’ve given you that the link, hopefully they’ll put that in the show notes. I’m sure Paula and Tesse will. And then the link to the book is a great tool. And then certainly reach out to me, and let’s share our voices together.
00:23:34 Paula: Thank you, Renee. Not only are you an amazing woman, we also know that we have an amazing audience, an amazing set of listeners. I want to thank you our amazing listeners for always tuning in. And I also want to encourage everyone who listens to this episode to follow us on Apple podcast, Google podcast, anywhere where you listen to your podcasts. And always love a five star review. And if you love what you’re hearing, the brightest of five star review. If you have questions or topics, you would love us to cover related to leadership or governance, please send us a note. And remember your notes can be personal as well as professional. And last but not least. If you’d like to be a guest on “TesseTalks”, please head over to our website, which is “Tesseakpeki/tessetalks” to apply. Thank you, Renee. This is beautiful.
00:24:42 Tesse: Yeah, Renee, we’ve loved having you. Thank you so much for gracing us today. Thank you. And gifting us. I guess that much.
00:24:48 Renee: It’s really been an honor and pleasure, and I’m so grateful for this opportunity to share our voices together.
00:24:53 Tesse: Amen. There you got it Paula.